Don’t Allow Overwhelm, Get in the Way of Your Success in Personal Change

Mark had been married for 4 years and during the course of the marriage he felt happy and Successful. One day his wife left him with no explanation and he suddenly felt plunged into despair. He began to neglect himself, his diet, personal care and his own drive and motivation. He had sleepless nights thinking about how things could have been different, almost wishing his wife back into his life.

This caused him challenges in the self aspect of his eco-system. His health began to suffer as he was becoming low in mood and anxious. He became lethargic because of a lack of sleep and also he lacked motivation. He was also losing weight unintentionally due to neglecting his diet.

In the social layer of his eco-system he was neglecting other relationships, his wider family, friends and work colleagues. This was because he was beginning to isolate himself socially. He was feeling as though success was evading him.

It soon became clear that his wife wouldn’t be returning this realisation arrived at around the 6 week point. His feeling of despair began to leave him and he began to feel he should be more proactive in helping himself. He began to think of how his life might look if he changed his current state of being.

In sessions Mark was helped to acknowledge that his current thoughts were unhelpful to him. He was encouraged to see a new state of being in the form of a new eco-system coming into view.

He worked on building up self awareness of his emotions. He had always been a dependent person. He saw that his wife was the key to his happiness instead of understanding that to find happiness it should be coming from within himself.

Once this awareness had been established, he began to build his bridge of personal change and transformation to take him to the new eco-system in moving from one state of being to another. He began to put into place the support resources, getting clear on what he desired from the new eco-system. Changing the way he was thinking about happiness and relationships. Taking action on what he desired as change and solving problems that presented themselves along the way.

Once he had concluded his 8 sessions he had built the bridge, supported it and moved successfully into the eco-system of his desired change. Realising that to be happy he had to find happiness from within himself and not from anyone else. This empowered him to rebalance his holistic health or state of being.

How to End Dissatisfaction and Start Enjoying Life Now!

Case Study: Simon

Simon is a 51 y/o married man with 2 grown up children. He has been married for 28 years and his Wife (Julie) loves him. His Children had left 2 years earlier to pursue marriage and the youngest – University, they were in regular contact as they love their parents. Since his Children left home and went off on their own paths, Simon became increasingly more dissatisfied with his life.

He noticed that he was blaming his Wife for most things that he saw as going wrong in their lives. He also noticed that he had become more irritable and was having some difficulty in getting to sleep at night.

Simon had become so dissatisfied with life that he couldn’t see any reason to be happy. Simon himself was in good health, as was Julie. All Simon could see was that every time something he saw as going wrong in his life happened, well – that led to something else going wrong too.

He knew that he should do something about this state of mind. In personal development coaching sessions Simon was taught a relaxation technique (controlled breathing) which he was to practice for 5 minutes each time and 3 times a day. He was also encouraged to list all the things he had experienced in life and all that he currently had in his life that gave him a reason to feel thankful.

Upon writing up his thankfulness journal, Simon noticed that he was beginning to feel more appreciative of all the things in his life, Julie, his children, his own health, his home, his possessions, his job. Once he started to write up his journal he began to notice that there was so much in his life to be grateful for.

After 2 weeks of doing this he felt more relaxed in himself. He also felt appreciative for all he had in his life. He even started to see perceived negative events as positive as there is something to be learned from each experience in life. This new learning leads to more positive changes.

Julie noticed the difference and felt much more relaxed around him. He now finds reasons to be thankful while enjoying all that he has in his life right now.